There'll be music. Sweet music.

I love Vietnam. I love the people. I love Hanoi. I love the countryside and I love the food.

But man, the music sucks.

I'm sorry but Vietnamese pop is not for me. Think of the worst excesses of Western boyband/girlband pap and then add in the more random beats of Asia. Throw in, as well, that off-key stuff that sounds so haunting when applied to traditional tunes and so absolutely awful in a pop context.

Consequently on the rare occasions you hear western music it sounds like it is being sung by angels, backed by Jesus and Mary and remixed by God. It doesn't even have to be good Western music.

For example, as I think I have said before, for some reason Boney M are (still) massive here. It's a big karaoke favourite and I have been known to croon along to "Daddy Cool" after several glasses of rice wine.

I do, however draw the line at "Seasons in the Sun" which is also inexplicably popular.

This weekend though I was at an Aid for Asia benefit gig which had the aim of raising money for the Tsunami appeal. I got quite excited in the build up. Even more so when I got there. There were food stalls, there was a stage, there was sunshine, there were beer tents. There were bands too.

How fantastic. How un-Vietnamese.

No Glastonbury in the UK for me this year. But, in a smaller Hanoi way, this will do for now.

So with the KOTO kids running our own stall and providing hot pies and sarnies, I was confident it was going to be a great day.

And it was. By kicking out time I had danced like a fool for several hours. If Boney M can start to sound good - can you imagine what it was like to hear Smells Like Teen Spirit? Or Pyscho Killer? How about the Clash's "I'm so Bored of the USA"? Even better, there was even a Buzzcocks moment with "Ever Fallen in Love".

Fantastic. Chuck in a few Stones covers (Sympathy for the Devil and Jumping Jack Flash)and there's good singalong stuff too.

It's weird. I guess there are only so many classics and back home you almost become immune to their charms. A little rock music starvation and even a half decent pub band can sound quite amazing.

Just beautiful.

In fact everything was beautiful. I filled in occasionally on the door but wasn't involved with the organisation of the event. But I could see that light in the eyes of those who were. That "We Did This!" look as they could see so many people donating money and having fun too.

Earlier, as it had started to get dark, between the more kids-based afternoon stuff and the later noisier bands, there had been a very moving candlelight vigil and three-minute silence.

Most of the organisers shared a mutual friend who died in Koh Phi Phi, Thailand. In those minutes I think we were all thinking of her.

And while the day made a lot of money for a very good cause, I think, if we were honest, there was an unofficial motive too.

Although no one said it out loud, Aid for Asia was in memory of our friend.

She would have loved it.

Coming Home Hanoi

Well, I tried. Really I did. Koh Chang was too busy then Koh Mak was too quiet. And now? Well, I'm back in Bangkok and I'm flying home a couple of days early. In the end, I decided that I'd most enjoy the last couple of days of my time off, If I took them in Hanoi.

Koh Chang was nice for a couple of days. The first night it was so over-crowded that I ended up without a beach hut. I slept out under the stars at Sunset Huts who were good enough to let me use their facilities. In the morning I was first on the list for a beach hut.

So I stayed there for two more nights. There were a nice group of people and we wiled away the evenings at this quiet little spot away from the noisiest areas of (not so) Lonely Beach. But, the first night there was an Australian in tears because he had been drinking for a year and now everybody thought he was a dickhead (he was). He spent much of the rest of the time staggering round and shouting. The next night a Scottish guy tried to fight the Thais because they wanted the money he owed them (seems fair). He claimed another shadowy group of Thais were trying to kill him. Too much beer, too much sun, too much Thailand - it seems - sends you mad.

That night someone tried to ram one of the posts of my beach hut. Koh Chang was idyllic went I visited three years ago. Now, it seems, it's wrecked. Way too many morons.

So I moved on. And I stayed for three or four nights at Cococape Resort on Koh Mak. It was another nice, family run place. I sat on my hammock, in my hut over the water, I read my books and I got eaten a live by mozzies. And after three days I realised there was nowhere I wanted to move on to next. Well, nowhere except Hanoi that is.

So I made the day-long trip from Koh Mak to Trat, back to Bangkok and popped into the travel agent. I switched the dates of my ticket to an earlier slot and I fly out lunchtime tomorrow.

It's been a good trip. Good despite very average weather. I've had a rest, I've got a few things clear in my mind - and in the end, 10 days was more than enough for that.

But I'm also not sure what has happened to me since I was last in Thailand. In 2002, I loved the place. In 2005 virtually every backpacker wound me up. Why do they insist on talking as if travelling in Thailand is really "living on the edge" as if they're making some voyage of discovery? Why do they say stupid things (like the girl who looked out over Khao San Rd and observed that it was too touristy), or the guy who claimed Sunset Huts was great because it was much more authentic Thai (yeah right, because Thais always eat and drink banana milk shakes on wooden decks above the sea with Buddha Bar music playing - the locals, like Vietnamese locals are more likely to socialise in strip lighted, corrugated iron places).

Okay, no more bitching. Otherwise I'll sound (in the words of my Aussie KOTO colleagues) a whinging pom.

So, today I'm mooching around Thailand again. Stocking up on CDs and eating junk food that you can't (thankfully) get in Hanoi. And yes, I do love Thai food - but (this) man cannot live by rice (and noodles) alone.

Thailand remains a really beautiful place. If there is a next time then I'll have to be a little more adventurous in where I choose to go.

Still, this time tomorrow I'll be in the airport, checking in for my flight to Hanoi.

Our Man in Bangkok

Ok so I'm taking a two week break. I'm writing this from an internet cafe in the Khao San Rd.

I must admit I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with this place. As much as we all want to go "off the beaten track", if you're a lone traveller then finding an unexplored paradise would probably mean talking to yourself for two weeks.

So, in the end, you do what every else does - you buy the Lonely Planet and follow the hordes - well some of the hordes anyway. Preferably I'll avoid backpackers in those silly Thai trousers and ravers biding their time before the next full moon party.

Anyway, for obvious reasons it's a strange time to be in Thailand. I can't work out whether it's subdued or not. Certainly, I'm sure that last time I was here there was more carnival to the place - or maybe it's just my own mood that's affecting the way I am seeing things. Every time I see someone with a limb in plaster I imagine them as having escaped the tsunami - in reality they probably got drunk and fell out of a tuk tuk.

One of the more sickening sights last night was a group of preachers right in the middle of Khao San. I didn't stop to listen to them for long but basically it was fire and brimstone stuff - the Tsunami was God cleansing Thailand's dens of iniquity, apparently. I saw a couple of people arguing with them but it says a lot for the peaceful spirit of the place that they were ignored rather than attacked.

In our little circle of Hanoi ex-pats we had been saying, ever since news filtered through, that we were bound to know someone who had escaped Christmas in cold Hanoi and gone to Thailand. Horribly, as it turned out, we did and we got the worst of news last week. I'll don't want to go into it any further than that but, suffice to say, the "missing" pictures and lists pinned to the railings at the end of the street are an emotive sight.

Because of this I feel a vague resentment to any partying right now - which is, of course, both ridiculous and unfair.

I will, however, wave goodbye to the city tomorrow as I'm off to Koh Chang. I thought long and hard about where I was going to go once the news filtered through about the tsunami. It was always going to be an island off the untouched east coast, but I wasn't sure what the knock on effect would be - would everyone switch their travel plans to the other coast and would all the hotels be booked? And then of course I felt guilty for being troubled by holiday plans when the news continued to get more horrific by the day.

In the end though I have settled for Koh Chang. It's a relatively short trip from Bangkok and about as far away from the troubled areas as you can go - well it is if you want to go to the beach.

As much as I know Thailand needs tourist dollars there is part of me that feel bad that I'm here for a holiday. Then again there is another part of me that just wants to shut out the news for a couple of weeks. I'm not sure there is anyway of trying to resolve these feelings except for making some kind of a donation at one of the many collecting points here.

Anyway, it's an early start tomorrow then it's a bus and ferry to Koh Chang. In the meantime I'll have a quiet night watching the Newcastle game. I saw a scary bloke this evening with Sunderland tattoos - hopefully I can avoid him.

Pho Ga for the Soul

The Yard

Ok bizarre Vietnam situation #431

It's New Years Day. Each year KOTO takes part in a Winter Appeal. Basically, money raised is spent with the aim of helping people through the chilly winter nights in the North of the country.

This year we visited a youth detention centre. Not only were we giving out warm blankets to the residents, we were also providing over 1,000 bowls of hot pho ga (chicken noodle soup). Oh, and providing entertainment for the day are: The Girl Band.

So this is where we join the scenario. I'm unshaven, hungover and on a bus heading to a detention centre. With us is Hanoi's premier girl band. They're applying make-up by the bucket load and basically looking menacing in lethal looking stilleto boots. Not for them the western antics of home - no sex, drugs and rock and roll - instead we have mandarins and little, sour Vietnamese apples. Phew.

So far, so wierd. It all seems a long way from what I would be doing at home - namely getting up late, pigging out and nursing my head through whatever film is being repeated on TV.

It's only when we get there though that the surreal nature seems to go into overdrive. As we arrive and park the bus, in front of us are the 800 expectant residents all sat crossed legged in the centre of the exercise yard. As you can imagine, the girl band is provoking a lot of interest within the predominantly male, predominantly adolescant audience.

But as ever, it's that extra air of atmosphere that somehow makes the whole thing dreamlike. The sun is setting behind the mountain, the sky is somewhere between gold and pink and it's all too surreal. Suddenly it feels like I'm in a rockumentary or the scene in Apocalypse Now when the playmates entertain the troops.


Being a VIP

And so, in a short time, we're lined up on the head tables to hear the speeches. There's lots of gift presenting, lots of handshaking and lots of photos. Then we're treated to a group of kids dancing for us.




Then the KOTO kids sing, the girl band do their thing. Roses are actually distributed amongst the audience so they could rush forward and hand them out to the scantily (for Vietnam) clad ladies.

Later there's games - an ill-advised apple eating competition that ended in a near riot and our horribly cold, but seemingly happy looking audience can go and eat their meal.




Over 1,000 bowls of chicken noodle soup (pho ga) are cooked up by the kids. An absolutely staggering achievement that runs amazingly like clockwork. Hampered only slightly by me offering help, nearly scalding my hands and then spilling stinky fish sauce over my new warm jacket.

The warm meal seems to go down well with all. It's nice to know too that the kids can also retire with their new warm blankets.

Then we're invited to the warders' quarters where it's hot tea and rice wine for everyone. The tea is sipped - the rice wine is downed in one and then refilled (a moderate five times). Speeches are made saying thanks to our host and we reciprocate. Then our host sings (this happens a lot here). We choose something both the staff, kids and volunteers know, so we serenade them back with, of all things, "You are my sunshine".

Then it's time to say goodbyes, and we're back on the bus. The girl band has already departed and this time we travel with the kids.

We arrive back in Hanoi very late and we're tired. We unload the bus and we all depart the training centre in a happy convoy of scooters and pushbikes.

* Posting may be sporadic for the next couple of weeks. I fly to Thailand on Saturday. For obvious reasons I considered changing my plans but I reckon Thailand needs the tourist dollars more than ever. I intend to go to Koh Chang. I shall post on my return.